Funny Bones
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My wife bought me a mood ring
Did you hear about the young lady who was addicted to line dancing? They put her in a two step program. •••••••••• A pirate walks...
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Where there’s a will, I want to be in it
I have a friend who made billions of dollars writing and selling Cliff Notes. One day I asked him where he got the idea and...
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My memory is not as sharp as it used to be
A stage mother cornered the concert violinist in his dressing room and insisted he listen to a tape of her talented son playing the violin....
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How does Bigfoot tell time?
A man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asked, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you...
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly
As a child, I always had a fear of someone under the bed at night. So I went to a shrink and told him: “I’ve...
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Marriage counseling southern style
A young pastor was sitting in a restaurant eating lunch. He opened a letter he’d just received that morning from his mom. As he opened...
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My boyfriend told me to stop acting like a flamingo
I’ve decided I’ll never get down to my original weight and I’m okay with that…After all, 6 lbs 3 oz is just not realistic. ••••••••••...
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10 Signs You Know You Bought A Bad Computer
Tax collector: “It is your duty as a citizen to pay taxes, and we expect you to pay them with a smile.” Taxpayer: “Wonderful! I...
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Keep Off The Grass
Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don’t worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist:...
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Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock
“Doctor, doctor! The man you’ve just pronounced is in perfect health collapsed on the front step! What should I do?” vDoctor’s Lawyer: “Turn him around,...
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A man walks into a shoe store
This one is from our good pal Pete Hourihan of Orange Beach… The City’s largest Charitable Organization realized that it had never received a donation...
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It Was A Tough Year…But I Made It
It Was A Tough Year…But I Made It… – The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail. –...
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I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off
She texted me: Your adorable! I replied: No. You’re adorable! Now she likes me a lot. All I did was point out her typo. ••••••••••...
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She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still
As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, he asked her the usual question, “And what would you like for Christmas?” The child stared at...
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Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund?
Michael and his wife live in Minnesota. One winter morning while listening to WCCO, they hear the announcer say, “We are going to have 8...
