Funny Bones

  • I had my patience tested

    I broke up with my girlfriend because I found out she was a communist. I should have known, there were red flags everywhere. •••••••••• I...

  • Throw me off the train if necessary

    On a cross country train, one of the passengers told the Pullman porter, “I must get off in Chicago. I’ll probably be very sleepy and...

  • Silence is golden

    As the doctor completed an examination of the patient, he said, ”I can’t find a cause for your complaint. Frankly, I think it’s due to...

  • Consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing

    In Christmas COVID news, the seven dwarfs have been advised that they can only meet in groups of 6. One of them isn’t Happy! ••••••••...

  • My Door Is Always Open

    December is the month when the kids begin to discuss what to get Dad for Christmas. Some insist on a shirt. Others insist on a...

  • Don’t worry about old age

    Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director’s office. “What is the meaning of this?” the director...

  • My side will win

    • You’re getting old when you’re sitting in a rocker and you can’t get it started and you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and...

  • Don’t worry about old age

    If you rearrange the letters of Mailmen…They get really upset. ••••••••• Student: “Professor, I can’t go to class today.” Professor: “Why?” Student: “I don’t feel...

  • I like nice long walks

    A man was found guilty of overusing commas. The judge warned him to expect a really long sentence. •••••••••• At the funeral of the richest...

  • How long will this COVID thing will last?

    A lawyer’s dog is having a great time running around the neighborhood unleashed — it heads directly to the butcher shop and pilfers a roast....

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